An Angel for a Friend

 

The clamorous rain, the hidden stars

The demon that flies around

The moonless sky, the night of fright

Not a soul that can be found.

 

But here I am amidst the darkness

Unwanted and alone

But I don’t care and they don’t, too

They know I’m on my own.

 

They say I’m heartless, they say I’m dull

They say I’m always wrong.

They think they can hurt me just anytime

They think that I am strong.

 

They just don’t understand me

They wouldn’t even try

All they could think of is hurting me

By spreading all those lies…

 

I’m useless here; so why bother?

When I can always die

People would laugh at that idea

No one would even cry.

 

But someone stopped me on my attempt

My cries were all in vain

“You shouldn’t die” he said to me

“For it wouldn’t stop the pain”

 

“Why?” I asked, crying so hard,

“When happiness I couldn’t find?

Not even once I have I ever tried,

To have some peace in my mind.

 

The world cares not for what I do

So why should you even care?

I am an outcast in the society

To befriend me, they wouldn’t dare

 

I am a burden to others

As I live my life everyday

The only solution to take this burden

Is for me to go away…

So don’t stop me now!” I pleaded hard

His shirt damp from my tears

He held me close while I poured out my emotions

That I felt for many years.

 

For countless seconds we stood still

He held me while I cried

He already seemed to understand

The emotions I kept inside.

 

I looked into the strangers eyes

My shame so clearly

How could I have just said those things?

To a stranger or so it seems.

 

I tried to move away from him

But he only pulled me back

“I’ll give you love” he said to me

“The love that you seem to lack.

 

Please understand my being here

Understand my concern for you

These emotions of mine are not lies

Because my love for you is true.”

 

“How could that be?” I asked him

Directly there and then

“You said your love for me is true

When you don’t know who I am.”

 

“I know you more than you think I do

Although I may seem like a passer-by.

I know how hurting there words can be

And how you tried so hard not to cry.

 

I know how you became an outcast

And when you felt like you don’t belong

I know how hard you scolded yourself

When you did what you thought was wrong.

 

I know that others make fun of you

And that you cry yourself to sleep

I know how many times you’ve hoped

That a friend you’ll someday meet.

 

 

I know that you say you’re worthless

And that you are always wrong

I know how hard you put up an act

And pretend that you are strong.

 

I know how many times you’ve wished

That you were never born

Never to show the hurt you feel

Was something that you have sworn.

 

I know everything about you

I know your fantasies

I know what you have pictured

Of what you thought was your destiny

 

But I’ll tell you now, I’ll tell you true

Just continue on your way

If you think that what you’re doing is right

Then ignore what others say.

 

They’re spreading lies all around

They are out to destroy you

Don’t waste your time and thoughts on them

You have better things to do.”

 

“You’re the only one who believes in me

And yet, you’re a stranger passing by

How do I know that all these things

Are true and aren’t lies?”

 

“Look into my eyes, they’ll tell you

That my love for you is true.

I could never tell you any lies

You know that I love you.”

 

Then I knew that I believed in him

And I wanted him to be my friend

Somehow I knew my heart has learned

To trust someone again.

 

He smiled at me and offered his hand

It seems he understands

“Do you trust me now?” he asked me then

“Do you trust me as friend?”

 

I was touched by his understanding

But I didn’t want to cry

I merely smiled back at him

My eyes gave my reply.

 

And so he became my companion

He was my only friend

But I know that our relationship

Was something that wouldn’t end.

 

He was the one who helped me find

The confidence that I have today

And he was the one who helped me

Make new friends each day.

 

I felt my life grow better

And I started to feel strong

I wanted to thank my first friend

But something seemed so wrong.

 

I couldn’t find him anywhere

I searched for many days.

I couldn’t find my first friend

He disappeared without a trace.

 

After a long time of searching

He finally came to me

The sadness in his gentle eyes

Was all that I could see

 

“What’s wrong?” I asked him

Although I already knew his reply

“It’s time for me to go”, he said

“It’s time to say goodbye.

 

They’re waiting for me and I have to go

But this I want to say

Wherever you are whatever you do

I’ll be with you everyday.

 

I’ll never let you out of my sight

I will always protect you

Please understand that leaving you

Is the last thing I would do.”

 

“But you can’t just leave!” I cried to him

“Letting you go is hard to do

After all those times we’ve gone through

I’ve fallen in love with you!

And what do you mean by protecting me?

How could you do that when you’re gone?”
”You don’t understand” he whispered softly

“My work in here is done.”

 

And then he disappeared without a trace

Nothing to remember him by

He came to see me before he left

But I wasn’t able to say goodbye.

 

And so my life went on as it is

But now surrounded with my friends

But one thing that my heart was wishing

And that was to see my friend again

 

He was the greatest gift that heaven sent

He was so good and kind

And, indeed, he was the greatest friend

The truest that I can find!

 

He accepted me for what I am

And not for how I look

He took away my devastation

And my heart with it he took.

 

But now he’s gone, I’m all alone

Friends to talk to but not confide

I love him so much, I want to cry

But I kept my tears inside.

 

For my tears could never bring him back

There’s no reason for me to cry

Cause even if I didn’t say the word

It was our final goodbye

 

One day in the library

While I studied the works of art

A picture that stood out from the rest

Caused the pain inside my heart

 

For my memories were starting to unfold

As I looked at the picture of my friend

He looked the same as ever before

And I longed to see him again.

 

His face was happy, but his eyes were sad

This I was able to see

“Why are you sad my friend?

Why are you sad like me?

 

Is it because you’re far away?

Is it because we’re far apart?

But wasn’t it you who left me alone?

Wasn’t it you who broke my heart?

 

I couldn’t stand the memories

But still, I read about my friend

It said that he was an angel

Whose love would never end.

 

But unlike the other angels

He had to earn his wings

He chooses the person he wants to guide

And happiness he surely brings.

 

He was a special angel

Indeed he truly was!

He was so different from the other angels

From the first until the last

 

He made everyone happy

All throughout the day

Cause in everything that he does

He did in a special way.

 

The silence in the library

Was unaffected by my cries

My silent cries of sadness

Caused by the memories I hold inside

 

I borrowed the book from the library

And quickly ran outside

I wanted to be alone that time

I really wanted to hide.

 

Am I the one my friend has chosen

For him to love and guide?

Am I the one he chose to protect

And forever stay by my side?

 

But why? I wondered to myself

Why an outcast like me?

An angel like him, so kind and special

Should never protect me.

“But I chose you”, a voice said suddenly

“You’re special in your own way

You’re different from the other people

Not like the ones that you see everyday.”

 

“Why would you care?” I cried to him

“You left me all alone!”

“That is not true”, he said to me

“You aren’t your own.

 

Cause even when my work was done

I had always protected you.

I am your angel, I am your guide

I, too, have fallen in love with you.”

 

“Are only saying that because

I’m the one you’re supposed to guide?

Do you really love me like you say you do? 

Is that what you feel inside?”

 

I got no answer in reply

So I turned away and cried

Suddenly I felt a familiar presence

Standing by my side

 

I didn’t want to turn around

Because I know that it was my friend

And I know that it would worsen the pain,

If I turn and see him again.

 

But he held me close to him and said

“Don’t reject me, I beg of you.

Do you know how hard it was for me

To love and yet leave you?

 

I had always loved you from the start

And it grew with each new day

I love you so much that it hurt me so

When I had to go away.”

 

The silence followed when I couldn’t speak

After hearing what he had said

I thought about our pain and grief

Because of what our love has led.

 

I thought about our happy times

Together, we were strong

Everything seemed so good that time

So what did we do wrong?

 

“Have you earned your wings?” I asked

He just smiled and said, “Take care.

I’ll always be around, protecting you

To leave you, I wouldn’t dare.”

 

I looked at him, my eyes so sad

“Is this our final goodbye?”

“This is goodbye, but not the final one

So I don’t want to see you cry.”

 

I smiled when ha said those words

My sadness had all but gone

My angel smiled and held me close

“My second work is done.”

 

And with that he disappeared

No tears and no goodbyes

I smiled and tried to hold my tears

Cause I promised not to cry.

 

I flipped the pages of the book

And began to read again

And then I turned the page to see

The picture of my friend

 

But when I saw the picture

It really surprised me so

That changes in the picture

Gave the answer that I wanted to know

 

The changes in the picture

Was truly a wonderful sight

My friend now has an angelic wing

And a halo shining bright.

 

But my friend was crying and it seems to me

That he wasn’t happy at all

“Why are you crying when you told me to stop?”

And a tear started to fall.

 

 

 

≈THE END≈